My “We want you dead but trust Jesus” trip to Las Vegas
On New Year’s Day I made two decisions. Not to pay my bills and to take a much needed vacation to… Oh I don’t know.. Vegas? How L.A. of me… But how many days would they not allow me to move in, or how many more hours would I have to waste entertaining them while they threaten my life 24/7? How many times do I have to rebuke them and how many times do I have to say “get out of my crotch, get out of my skull, get out of my house, stay away from my car and get off my land?” How many days screaming at my sink because 911 and the cops refuse to do anything to keep them away from me? How many more days would I have to put up with the local’s code while they won’t let me grocery shop or run my errands “in the cooker”…Herald Leader comics and people laughing for no reason… except “death”? This isn’t your game board U.K. and it’s been years at this point. A decade. How much more time money and life do any of them get to steal from me. Everyone owes me money at this point. I’m out of here!
Buying on Groupon was a mess. I picked downtown and The D which was formally Fitzgeralds to stay at. (Although the sorcerers wanted me at the Tuscany it would have been too close to the experience of staying at Belterra locally. I made a full itinerary of downtown to do and I’ll do what I want) Checked vegasdotcom and finally decided to buy through hotelsdotcom. My deal was three nights for $24.33 plus resort fees $140.19 paid in full. (Equivalent to an original deal at Groupon) and decided to stop at how smooth the transaction went.
Frontier $169.45 round-trip.
Combo ticket Neon Museum and Mob Museum $30. While I was at the Mob Museum website I took the quiz for my drink “Twelve Mile Limit”… nah.
Total $339.64 (and at the time I was only thinking I needed to buy my show ticket plus SlotZilla ride but Satan had other plans)
January 10
Errands! First I had to get my drivers license to be able to fly. It had expired in August so thank you God for protecting me! Sodas and chips for the ride. Gas at Shell. Bank for cash and back to pack for my trip (threats the whole time.. it was hard to get through) I had to take two sizes of pants but was missing a size in between so decided to add the Premium Outlets to my list near downtown. I can literally walk from the house to the car and back and have my pants around my ankles with all the constant witchcraft going on. My face can change hourly. Tops depending on my mood so went through them twice to get it all to fit. Yeah I know… for only three days but I’m a girl. We overpack for every emergency. Got in my car and listened to Christmas music on the way to cheer me up. Smooth sailing the whole way to CVG, parked in the ValuPark lot and the shuttle was right by my car to get into and to the airport immediately.
But then I missed adding my checked in luggage by 10 minutes… huh? So they said I would have to buy another flight. My confirmation number on Allegiant (connected with Frontier) was #6SMRCV and $109 more. I saw the sale on Southwest later on my trip through email for $59 one way but at the time it was more if I flew on Frontier and they only had one flight 24 hours later. Allegiant was only 12 hours later. The woman suggested since it was overnight to take the shuttle to DoubleTree and enjoy a good meal at a restaurant and told me about the courtesy phones downstairs. When I got back she said I could join the others sleeping on the couches to wait for my morning flight.
The shuttle guy was at the curb by the time I walked to where to meet him and I ate at Bistro Danielle. He told me I could sneak into their library and enjoy some TV and Internet time. I met a really nice Mexican photographer outside and we talked about my possible cruise to Mexico. He said Cancun wasn’t that great but that the beaches were beautiful. Then we talked about his trip to the Appalachians where he couldn’t believe they couldn’t read or write. I told him I was excited to take photos of the neon signs at the museum.
I picked up a flyer on the Ark Encounter and a Cincy city guide at their desk. The only thing they had on the TV was Obama’s speech and I wondered if this was why I had to stay over (I wouldn’t have ever watched it!) When the audience gave him a standing ovation to his anti-semitic remarks I wanted to take names but I knew God was already. Back to the airport on the shuttle and I threw my lighter away before TSA pre-check. I didn’t want any problems getting on the plane
January 11
Paradies Cincy airport for snacks. What happened to peanuts and not having to buy soda on a plane? I think the last time I flew they were feeding us meals too. The flight was typical but it got noisy with this thing in my skull. I had to spend the last 30 minutes breathing into the throw up bag from the pocket in front of me to keep calm.
At Hudson McCarren airport the first thing I did was buy a lighter. By the time I walked to baggage claim and stopped at a store to buy one my luggage was in their office and I headed outside to start trying to get a ride to the hotel. I had quite a number of choices. I saw that The D had a shuttle (found out at the end of my trip… I think they said $9) The airplane was offering round trip for $14 but I wasn’t going directly to the airport at the end of my trip but to Mandalay Bay. I had an Uber deal and Lyft deal but chose the Uber for a ride to the hotel with $15 off from Vegas4locals (Lyft greeted me at the airport with $50 but it was $5 off 10 rides so saved it for possible shopping at the premium outlets (never did! pants!) and to the Mandalay Bay and airport rides. Then I had another offer for $15 off from Vegas4locals but it was for new customers only by then. A really nice couple helped me order my Uber ride and I shared a ride in a BMW series 7 with another nice girl who needed to be dropped off at the Linq. On the side of the road I saw a sign “trust Jesus” and enjoyed the drivers music.
Checked into the D. I got the same guy who I had spoken to the night before when I called to say I had missed my flight. He was so nice and said even though I had to pay for the first night they would waive the resort fee. At first they gave me a non-smoking room so had to go back to the desk. The girl who helped me gave me an upgrade offer of a larger corner King with a fridge which I would have done if my stay wasn’t cut short. I noticed immediately how comfortable I felt there so I wondered if it was Feng shui (?) After I got my new room I went back and got my D card and noticed the Long Bar was closed for renovations (it was reopened on my last day the 13th) I went upstairs and bought my ticket for Marriage Can Be Murder saving $20 from Vegas4locals which mainly paid for taxes and fees. Back to the room I called the Neon Museum since I missed my guided tour. Even though I couldn’t use my combo ticket they said I could still use it for the Mob Museum. Tomorrow!
4:30 already! Went to the Fremont Hotel for the best prime rib at Tony Roma‘s for $8.99. My new fave drink is a Coco Libre which is Captain Morgan rum and Coke. I had two! Coffee and cheesecake for dessert and the waiter Dominic was such a cutie. While I waited I had gotten my Bconnected card and they had given me two packs of Aristocrat cards. I bought a poker chip. Afterwards I received the play $5 get $5 and played blackjack slots and video poker. I was able to slide my card a few times but had to skip the buffet win from Young at Heart as it expired at 9pm that same night and I had just eaten.
Took a walk along Fremont but I don’t remember an actual Fremont experience show! The lights and music with zip lines overhead was just continuous. I wanted to take a ride and it was on my list but I was too tipsy to have handled it. The Venofye Queen Bee guy gave me a sample of day moisturizer. I had been a Jafra consultant and knew about Royal Jelly so decided to talk to him. It was way out of my league expense wise but the gentleman was so sweet to me and made me a good offer. I was just too tired to have a facial when I knew I wouldn’t be purchasing. I found Walgreens down the street for sodas (saved me a lot of money during my trip) and had $1 balance rewards! Yea I won!
After I dropped them back off in my room (and I kept getting off on the wrong floor!) I went back downstairs to check the D’s casino. I bought a poker chip and played a set of video poker but was bored. I finished up by sitting down at the Sherlock Holmes slots (my new favorite!)
My room was loud but not as annoying as it was at home (thing in my skull again!) It had nothing to do with Fremont Street and I probably would have welcomed hearing some of the music. Didn’t get much sleep.
January 12
I went to Dunkin’ Donuts at the Fremont casino for a ham n egg English muffin, a long John donut and some iced coffee. Ate at a slot machine and headed to the Mob Museum. It was very emotional for me (my great grandfather Walker B Allen was in the Missouri mob during prohibition) and I overheard a family discussing that their family was part of the Jewish mob. I left my story video and even though I didn’t have time to watch the movies, I listened to the documentary they had throughout the museum and I went through all three floors. They had a prohibition fashion display called Ready to Roar and I made a note to talk to my mom about the purses she had from grandma (a flapper) She might need somewhere to donate them if she still has them. The music was fun inside and outside of the museum and they had Dean Martin singing in one room (my mom‘s favorite!)
Mob Museum hats were too expensive there and at the D so I just bought little things. Victory candy cigarettes for 53 cents and I squished a penny for 51 cents! It has the Mob Museum imprint on the back and I chose the barbershop chair on the front for dad. I hadn’t done that in years and the guy watched me turn the crank and cheered me on. I didn’t use the audio tour since I had to turn it back in at the end (I want a boot of it!) or 20% off at the gift shop (off 53 cents? lol) from myVegas but got my free photo. It looks very “dad‘s mad” of me. I thought later I might have been able to talk them into a membership ticket exchange since I didn’t use the Neon Museum portion but I was too upset. Back to Walgreens for sodas. They were out of 2 liters but I peeked into the biker bar Hogs and Heifers and Pizza Rock and made note of the Grand on the way there.
Noticed immediately a shortage of cough medicine among the patrons of Fremont street and in the D (and I thought only Kentucky had that problem!) Made it back just in time for the show Marriage Can be Murder. It included a three-course meal: salad, dead meat with veggies and I think with mashed potatoes? Dessert was one scoop of vanilla ice cream with chocolate chips sprinkled on it.
Too busy with the show which was really really upsetting to say the least. SNL part 1 and 2 was bad enough but this wasn’t even SNL! Why is this happening? I was looking forward to an interactive murder mystery about marriage so I could laugh at all the stupid married people that want to kill each other and we’re doing a situation I lived through and barely survived to everyone’s laughter. Sal Manilla wins best actor as the May Tur D just for his Sammy Hagar impression and being the first one to die. You had the stupid cop in Georgetown down pretty good but the Jessica and Jonathan sitting across from me was annoying. Is everyone who is left in the world a complete set up? Sledgehammer.. yes… “Peter” and I got interviewed by Vic the vaper and he only asked me where I was from (California) not where I was attempting to live (Kentucky) and yes.. I wanted to kill everyone with a bat as supposedly I play baseball. So now I’m a lumberjack song.. well that’s Ralph and Donna and I at Phases in Canoga Park in the 80s but the guy had a full beard and was supposedly from Kentucky? (I don’t know you! I don’t like beards!) He told Vic he wanted to torture everyone slowly with a paperclip. When I was interviewed during the show I just kept correcting the cop “I’m from California!” and repeating “I did nothing! I do nothing!” and the flower girl MC said “point 5” To who? Oh.. Dueling Banjos! Yes that’s Steve Martin. Oh look a stoned drunk kid with an eye patch who comes out as a Vegas show dancer and points to his butt at me. Nah… kiss MY butt. The Mister Rogers guy and the glasses drawn on Alfred Hitchcock on the way out did not make me laugh… But good luck in showbiz!! Operation Paperclip and Hitler is not something I choose to laugh at. You’re with Barnett and Blake losers. Coughity cough cough cough…
I went to Binions! I took my picture, got my card and bought a poker chip. They had a free spin coupon and matched slot play I could use for poker slots in the 98% payback section. By the time I swiped my card for the second time I knew I had to go back the next day for my gift and the rest of the coupons as Club Binions had closed.
When I got back to the D I went back to the Sherlock Holmes slots. They literally stopped my comps at 69. I was livid. I wanted at least one try at the “Dodge”Viper (I owned two Mavericks and a “Dodge” Colt in L.A. when I lived there and the Dodge was my fave) I stopped at American Coney Island at the D for a hot dog with everything. Jimmy Fallon was on their walls in a few places and I stuck my tongue out at him.
People can do that if their family is from Michigan!
No sleep AGAIN! I came all the way to Vegas for some of that.
January 13
In the morning I checked out and turned in my bags to the bell hop. I went to the D Grill as they had given me a percent off (10%?) ticket and ate a cheese quesadilla and soda. It came with four different salsas. Too much to do before I had to leave downtown.
The first thing I did was I went to Sardi’s… wait no.. Had my caricature done on Fremont Street by a really nice guy. Just black and white for $20 who did a really cute picture. I think he captured my eyes even though he made me look younger than I am. Our family use to have them done at Disneyland all the time and it’s fun to have it done.
Tried another Binions picture and got two this time so I’ll be sending one to my son. Picked up my gift I won from the night before (a storage set for Goodwill) Then coupons. Went to the 80% off store for two free luggage tags and so wanted to purchase a carry on Las Vegas bag for $5 but decided not to. Free custard at Nathan’s. Because of the photo in the room at the D I decided to use my $10 blackjack bet where the coupon was an Ace and doubled my money!
I went to the Grand and got my card and gambled on the video poker. They matched (was it $10?) but I had no time to really get any kind of points towards the pink T-Bird. I bought my last poker chip and she smiled and asked if it was a souvenir? She also gave me a commemorative poker chip from their grand opening in 2013.
I bought a Kenny K hat from a street vendor at $25. It was the cheapest one I could find that I liked. Pinstriped! (the straw and basic felt were running around $20 and the nicer ones like this for $40 and $50 at the Mob Museum and the D)
Needed another soda so back at Walgreens. I noticed 2 liters were back in stock but I couldn’t lug them around at that point. The girls at the front cash registers liked my caricature and he actually stopped me on the way past him again to take a picture with it for his portfolio. I will always regret not asking him to send a copy to my email. Another Venofye queen bee day moisturizer sample handed to me so I had one to go.
I got my luggage from the bell hop and went into the ladies room so I could repack my bag and got in trouble with their security. I can’t help it if they don’t have a ladies lounge in their restroom but I don’t think I should have been treated that way if I didn’t want my underwear all over the casino floor. Couldn’t get in on their Wi-Fi at first but the front desk helped me. Homer (a valet?) liked my hat and told me to be sure and come back. He was really nice and talked to me until Lyft came. I got $5 off my ride to Mandalay Bay.
The valet there was really nice and took my bag and I went to the front desk who gave me a casino map of where to find Mlife for my card and then the House of Blues. I checked into the shop first and then went to the bar for a Cadillac margarita which was one sip and a tot mess. MyVegas rewards used 20% off the check and I got a free glass with another reward. I picked one for the Coco Libres but it didn’t have a handle! Mason jar with House of Blues on it. Jenn and her friend sat next to me at the bar. They were so nice and Jenn agreed to take a picture of me and one of the bartenders and send it to me.
Downstairs to get my bag and Al from Lyft gave me my $5 off ride to the airport. I made it just in time and even though I was exhausted I couldn’t sleep on the plane.
January 14 to January 15
Arrived at 5am and the Red Roof Inn was the only hotel the rest of the courtesy hotels could think of that allowed smoking. I had to hire a cab to get there and back to the airport the next morning also. Got my Redistay card number there but it cost me $70. I slept as much as I could in 24 hours. At night I went to Speedway because my lighter broke and one of the cashiers gave me a bic with a broken chain picture on it.
The total parking fee was $40 at CVG ValuPark but it was such a blessing as the shuttle picks you right up by your car and drops you off at your airline entrance for $8 a day and then does the same. Drove home exhausted to them starting up again. They have to leave. They will leave.
